Wow. I can’t believe this is my first post of 2019. It’s definitely not what I envisioned and this year hasn’t been what I expected so far, but that’s what life is all about, right? Let me just say that depression can hit you hard sometimes and it’s okay to take a step back. But, I’m back and just wanted to share a little bit (because talking about it makes me feel better) on why I took a break.
Like I said, def not how I thought I would start the year off, but I have worked on my blog every single day for the past year and the last 5 days I didn’t do a single thing for it.
At first it was so weird not sharing my life on Instagram stories or staying up late to get a blog post up, but it quickly turned into a much need social media detox.
Even on my worst days since I started Keeping It Caitlin, I’ve worked on the blog. I may not want to do anything else that day, but I always loved putting time into the blog.
For the first time, I didn’t feel like that and it made me feel even worse. Like was I quitting? Giving up?
I have to say, J and I have so many good things coming up in 2019. Plans we have created together and are working towards, so don’t think I don’t recognize that I’m totally blessed. I can’t explain how depression works for everyone, but I know that everything can be going right and it still feels so wrong when you’re in a funk.
And I’ve definitely been in a funk.
I will be sharing more throughout the year probably, but there are just things that are out of my control that have been driving me crazy. Things you think should be so easy and aren’t. Things you wanted your whole life and can’t make possible yet. It’s the worst and it starts to eat at you. But I’m learning to work through it and know that I’m not in charge.
I’m so grateful for a supportive family and husband who encourage me to never give up. They have been my rock the past couple of weeks.
So, with all that said, I’m back and we’re back on track to sharing some amazing outfits, sales, and all the good things you came here for.
Sorry if this was a big, rambling mess. But I feel a little better now y’all. P.S. who is starting BBG with me tomorrow?!
cheers,
caitlin